I ended up on a crisis call today and worked a death at the hospital. It is strange how someone can be alive one second and dead the next. Reminded me of a M*A*S*H episode where Major Hoolihan remarks how it never ceases to amaze her that you are alive one minute and dead the next, no fanfare or anything. Just gone.
There are so many things that happen in the hospital after a death, that was more where I was uncomfortable than with the family although, I did have to confront my theological view of death as well as heaven and hell. One of the family members asked if I thought their mother went to heaven even if she didn't believe. As I have continued to ponder this, I end up looking to the invisible church and the fact that we don't know who is elect and who is not. I have to believe that God's love is bigger than I can even fathom and I have to hold hope that God leaves the 99 and looks for the 1, whether we want to be found or not.
Lots to process.
Peace
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This is as hard as nails. There's no way out of it. But something I find helpful is the first question and answer from the Heidelberg Catechism:
Q: What is your only comfort, in life and in death?
A: That I belong—body and soul, in life and in death—not to myself but to my faithful Savior, Jesus Christ, who at the cost of his own blood has fully paid for all my sins and has completely freed me from the dominion of the devil; that he protects me so well that without the will of my Father in heaven not a hair can fall from my head; indeed, that everything must fit his purpose for my salvation. Therefore, by his Holy Spirit, he also assures me of eternal life, and makes me wholeheartedly willing and ready from now on to live for him.
There is no easy way to be with the family. There is no platitude that will make their terror any less. But as the catechism says, if we believe that we belong-body and soul, in life and in death-not to ourselves but to our faithful Savior, Jesus Christ, then we will be able to reflect God's love. And this is what families need more than anything else at that moment, the love of Christ.
I discovered that just being is part of it. To listen as they review the life of their loved one and to support them as you can. To assure them that God is still present and that we do indeed belong to God.
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love,
Julie
The first death I ever directly experienced happened during my first week at CPE. His name was Eugene, and he ended up being one of the biggest blessings of my life, even though I never spoke a word with him.
You are in my prayers, Karen.
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